My mom wouldnt let go of my past and still talks about it and say mean things to hurt me.?

its not like I did something really bad I was just being a teenager when I was one like 10years ago!. wouldnt listen to mom drank with my friends well okay that is bad but she would still talk about it and everytime we talk she would say really mean things like I shouldnt have been born and the end of the conversation she always makes me cry.. I know she loves me but Im 26 she needs to stop being so paranoid and learn Im not a baby anymore but the thing is I argued with her the other day and her birthday is coming.. I dont know if I should call her up or not I know shes gonna curse at me for not being in touch and she dosnt need anything from me so why bother calling OR maybe not. but if I dont call her I think shes gonna be dramatic and ask me why didnt I call tells me thats why I deserve to treat this way yadayada yada I love her but shes driving me insane! I dont know what to do..I was thinking about sending her flowers but she hates flowers.

My mom wouldnt let go of my past and still talks about it and say mean things to hurt me.?
you need to recognize that yur mother is blackmailing u emotionally. ur teenage indiscretions are more than 10 yrs behind u but she wont let go. in the process she is turning you into a bitter angry person just like her.





am sure deep down u love yr mum but she needs to know that what she is doing is not helping u and that she herself needs counseling to deal with whatever issues are in her life. u may find that she is that way because she does not want to face her own problems/





find the strength to distance urself. instead of flowers which she hates u can write her a letter. thank her for bringing u up, mention some special times u had together. then remind her how ur life has changed and u are now a better person. therefore you will no longer be willing to listen to her putting u down. tell her that u are ok with being away from her until she can learn that the past mistakes are in the past. a good question would be 'what are u so afraid of mum?' or 'what do u want our relationship to be like?' that puts the burden on her. only let her know that u are there whenever she wants to start a healthy relationship
Reply:Wow, dramatic!! Your mother, no offense doesn't sound like she loves you like she ought to...like a mother loves a daughter...I mean, i was a TOTAL accident. Mom was raped and ended up with me and my mom is the most loving of all...Send your mother a little present with a card. She needs to let go of the past. It sounds like she blames you for all the wrongs in HER life...its sad!!
Reply:A lot of this I don't understand, but it sounds like you should send her flowers, lots of flowers !
Reply:Send her a card.
Reply:I understand its difficult for you to do. Well i think you have spent your time with your mom ... talking .. towards what ur feeling and u want from your mom, and telling her that your not kid anymore. Dont yell if your mom curses you. Infact,


Your mom will see if your acting likes adult or not, just show her.


Well the point is your mom doest want to feel that your abandon her, coz grown up people ussually leave their parents house.


Your love is the best gift to your mother, i think.


If your fail ...dont give up .... someday ur mom will understand you ... show to her that ur not a kid anymore and be a responsible person.



c++