I found some suspicious behavior in my husband & proof but he swears nothing happened?

I thought I had found the fairy tale !! i was the envy of all who knew us. I met my husband in 2002, and we become serious in 2003. We have been married 3 yrs in May. We had our first baby together March 2007 after loosing a baby prior. We were sooo in love, even after all the years together he still called me to say hi that he was thinking about me three times a day, gave me diamonds, flowers for every holiday. we made all of my co-workers sick with how lovey dovey we were.


I also have 2 kids from a prev marriage, %26amp; my husband has raised my youngest since he was 2yrs old, he is now 8. He always tell s me how much he loves me %26amp; HOW HOT I am, even thought I am 10 yrs older than him. I know i look a lot younger people think I am younger than him, he's 29 yrs old. Everything changed this summer, he became withdrawn %26amp; distant. I don't know if it was the stress of buying a new home ,new baby, new job he hated, but I started accusing him of cheating. he is so hurt but I lost trust

I found some suspicious behavior in my husband %26amp; proof but he swears nothing happened?
men like porn, dont worry about that - its not a big deal, youve more things to worry about.





it IS strange that you found a condom wrapper, but even if this is the truth, and the lie detector test shows he is telling the truth, will you believe him?do you think you can go back to normal now?





you are going to have to lay off him, because he will end up despising you for this. i know it hurts and you just want to know the truth, but i dont think he would keep it up this long with you nagging him unless he was actually telling the truth.





It was nasty of him to leave the condom there if it was to teach you a lesson. that is very hurtful
Reply:Oh good lord, you have created this huge mess and now you're refusing to deal with it? I think you need mental help. Seriously.





I 100% believe your husband put that wrapper there to teach you a lesson. If he really cheated, he would not have left it on the counter. You would have found it in a pocket, trash can, or under the bed.





You need to stop harrassing him about something he didn't do and deal with your anxiety and paranoia on your own.
Reply:Your insecurities are going to ruin your marriage and drive you crazy. Your fears seem to be unfounded, but if you really can't get over them do both of you a favor and end your marriage. But you'll have no one to blame but yourself if it turns out you divorced a good man for nothing.
Reply:He going thru something that he is not sharing with u. Give him time and take it day by day, try to get to the bottom of the issues and saved your marriage.
Reply:you can not judge someone by someone from your past now maybe your ex cheated on you and you could not get over it but to accuse him of cheating says that you let the age thing bother you very much and you do not have confidence in yourself perhaps you would have done better to accept that he would not lavish such attention on you if there was someone else
Reply:OK why did you accuse him of cheating? Did you smell perfume on him? did he lie about where he might have been? did you find any evidence at all?


Maybe the guy is stressed out with all the stuff that has happened...a job can make you do that if you are not happy and need to support your family. I would apoligize and sit down with him and talk..if it is the job then help him find a new one that will bring back the happines or whatever it is that is bothering him..........
Reply:wow, you need to lay off of this poor guy!


why are you accusing him of cheating?


I seriously believe that he did plant the condom wrapper, no guy is going to be so stupid as to leave that lying around.


And yes porn is fine!
Reply:You have definately gone overboard with your reactions. You named all the reasons he has to be depressed, stressed out, whatever, so why do you have to add to his distress? CHILL!


And give the guy a shoulder to lean on.
Reply:Lay off him already- he definitely left the wrapper there to teach you a lesson. If he really cheated do you think he would want you to find out? You really made a big mess out of nothing. Not everything is going to be bliss after you get married. Sometimes people get distant, sometime you don't get flowers and diamonds on every holiday. Get over this.





Acting in this way will RUIN your marriage, your man is going to get tired of you acting crazy and will actually go out and cheat on you if you do not stop.





Don't make him take the lie detector test, believe him. Let it go. There was really not a reason based on what you told me to lose trust. It seems like you are insecure for some reason. He is only 29, dealing with all these kids, a new job, a wife, and a house is difficult for any man especially at this age.





Let it go, please!!! You are going to ruin your marriage.





Also its 2008 women should all know by now that guys watch porn, it doesn't mean you are not enough or anything like that.
Reply:why do you give up so easily and think hes cheating after everythng has been soooooo great
Reply:all men have porn. Its not something that proves he has cheated. The wrapper is something that he probably did to prove a point. Not all men think clearly. If he has been faithful to you and been a great father to your kids, you need to believe that he loves you. You are being a little to sensitive. Him being with drawn is probably stress and you accusing him of cheating is not helping and accusing him will CAUSE him to cheat, if he passes the test then there should be no issue. It seems like you are more concerned with everyone elses perception of your relationship than the acutal state of the relationship.You need to trust him. Good Luck!



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